A Place In An Aurora: I can paint.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

I can paint.

YES van Gogh! Knew I could count on you for an uplift! "If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint", then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced." - Vincent van Gogh For me, this absolutely does apply painting. But, it also applies to spiritual practice!

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Tonight, I can write.

Unlike Pablo Neruda, who so gorgeously wrote of his ability to at last resolve the impending end of love in "the saddest lines," tonight, in the inward night of the soul, I am also writing about the end - the end of a life where miracles are neglected and therefore the ability to recognize that constant gifts in the present moment are lost to me.

I'm synthesizing schools of thought that are at times in pains to be distinct, but I can see how they work together. I'm getting in touch with a creative power, which I am realizing is the same as understanding all the potential purely ever only lies in appreciating this moment.

The past brought me joy, I feel fortunate when I look back. But the joy didn't actually block the pain. I had to realize it will come, but that I don't have to ride highs and lows. I can accept. And the more I accept, the less totally good or totally bad life will seem at any present moment. And in that state of acceptance, I understand that actual happiness is possible.

I embrace grace. I embrace compassion and just want to give it all to the world. I've appreciated this world. I met everyone here. I want every present moment to actually be the continuous beginning. So, I suppose I really am writing about the beginning, and the perpetual new day, of the spirit.